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2013/01/27
Summary of question
Is a woman who becomes a man\'s second wife sinful?
question
Salamun alaikum, Is a woman who becomes a man\'s second wife guilty and sinful? Will she be anathematized or cursed by the first wife? Has she committed a wrong act according to Shari\'ah?
Concise answer
1. As you know remarriage is an issue legislated and recognized as permissible by Islamic Shari'ah. There is no doubt about it as the Quran states:
«فَانْكِحُوا ما طابَ لَكُمْ مِنَ النِّساءِ مَثْنى وَ ثُلاثَ وَ رُباعَ فَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلاَّ تَعْدِلُوا فَواحِدَة»[1]
"And if you fear that you cannot act equitably towards orphans, then marry such women as seem good to you, two and three and four; but if you fear that you will not do justice (between them), then (marry) only one."
2. Naturally, if Islam has given such permission to man to adopt several wives, his second, third and fourth wives will not be guilty or sinful because of marriage with the man.
3. Meanwhile, when it comes to the permissibility of remarriage, we must say, becoming a man's second wife has a lot to do with the way the man lives with his first wife. If a man and his wife are living their ordinary lives together with mutual understanding, the husband won't need to embark on a second marriage. If at this time, a woman gets to know this man and tries to provoke his sentiments with her behavior and conduct in order to get married with him as his second wife, in such a case, she has destroyed the life of the first wife. This behavior on her part will be considered as a kind of injustice done to the first wife. That is simply because she has ruined a family and a good couple's life. Naturally, if the first wife curses the second wife, it will be effective.
4. It should be noted that it is not always true to say that whoever becomes the second wife of a man has somehow done wrong to the first wife. For instance, if a woman could not have fulfilled or did not want to fulfill the legitimate needs and demands of her husband, in this case if a woman agrees to become the second wife of such an individual, obviously she has not committed a wrong act and the first wife has no right towards her. In fact, if she curses the second wife, it will not affect her but it will affect her own life because God does not fulfill someone curses towards someone else for no just reason.[2]
5. The conclusion is that remarriage or marrying a second woman or becoming the second wife of a man depends on circumstances and conditions. It is a subject that differs from situation to situation; the rules applicable to it will also be different.
«فَانْكِحُوا ما طابَ لَكُمْ مِنَ النِّساءِ مَثْنى وَ ثُلاثَ وَ رُباعَ فَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلاَّ تَعْدِلُوا فَواحِدَة»[1]
"And if you fear that you cannot act equitably towards orphans, then marry such women as seem good to you, two and three and four; but if you fear that you will not do justice (between them), then (marry) only one."
2. Naturally, if Islam has given such permission to man to adopt several wives, his second, third and fourth wives will not be guilty or sinful because of marriage with the man.
3. Meanwhile, when it comes to the permissibility of remarriage, we must say, becoming a man's second wife has a lot to do with the way the man lives with his first wife. If a man and his wife are living their ordinary lives together with mutual understanding, the husband won't need to embark on a second marriage. If at this time, a woman gets to know this man and tries to provoke his sentiments with her behavior and conduct in order to get married with him as his second wife, in such a case, she has destroyed the life of the first wife. This behavior on her part will be considered as a kind of injustice done to the first wife. That is simply because she has ruined a family and a good couple's life. Naturally, if the first wife curses the second wife, it will be effective.
4. It should be noted that it is not always true to say that whoever becomes the second wife of a man has somehow done wrong to the first wife. For instance, if a woman could not have fulfilled or did not want to fulfill the legitimate needs and demands of her husband, in this case if a woman agrees to become the second wife of such an individual, obviously she has not committed a wrong act and the first wife has no right towards her. In fact, if she curses the second wife, it will not affect her but it will affect her own life because God does not fulfill someone curses towards someone else for no just reason.[2]
5. The conclusion is that remarriage or marrying a second woman or becoming the second wife of a man depends on circumstances and conditions. It is a subject that differs from situation to situation; the rules applicable to it will also be different.
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